Tristan Taormino's Opening Up is a high-quality resource for nontraditional relationship styles. By offering a glimpse into the lives of people who choose to have multiple partners, it's easy to see the similarities and relate. It's not always pretty, but no relationship is always pretty, and I appreciate the work these people do to have more love in their lives. Its greatest strength is the comprehensive descriptions of a wide variety of relationship types, from polyfidelity to swiniging to poly tribes and networks. Heller reveal how an understanding of attachment theory - the most advanced relationship science in existence today - can help us find and sustain love. At several points throughout the book, Taormino does validate monogamy, as long as it's a conscious choice made by both parties in the relationship. Nice to know about the compersion and about what I do with the jealousy.
However, Opening Up provides much more substantial material in putting the wheels on the ground and navigating non-monogamy in a pragmatic way. All said, a highly enjoyable read, especially for a serious non-fictional subject. This practical guidebook will help women break free of the mold of traditional monogamy, without the constraints of jealousy, possessiveness, insecurity, and competition. Taormino works hard to show the good, the bad, and the ugly of open relationships. That meant there had to be rules. Tristan's book is ideal for people who are just exploring the concepts of open relationships, but it's also a treasure trove of information for those who have been engaged in any type of open relationship that want to understand themselves better, expand their options, and discuss their relationships more clearly with other people.
I read The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Catherine A. But then lovers who care for things to stay hot and edgy must always be brave I think. For me though, it does feel best. This was the best of all of them and I don't have any of those complaints. Archived from on July 23, 2010.
If you flip to the stats in the back you'll discover that about 60% of her interview sample self-identified as kinky, so it's not surprising that it keeps coming up. Even if you never have any intention of living non-monogamously, do read Opening Up. One thing I have learned is to be continually assessing my life and the relationships I have created. They are passed very similarly. These lend a valuable perspective by which the reader can identify and connect with the information and advice offered. Fiona: So, it just became a mess. She shares a wealth of stories in the book, and they are something sacred to experience.
However, I do agree with her that if all couples had the kind of in depth, honest conversations and negotiations that are necessary for a successful open relationship, infidelity would decrease. Product Description Relationship expert and bestselling author Tristan Taormino offers a bold new strategy for creating loving, lasting relationships. I read most of them: some were focused on particular forms of nonmonogamy; others dominated by a spiritual bent, others were just poorly written or edited. I feel may have been partly to blame as it is the bible of the poly life. Opening Up is sure to open up your mind. I immediately felt a connection to this world and couldn't wait to read on. I decided to buy it and ended up deciding on the audio version.
She was a regular expert and panelist on for two seasons in 2002 and 2003. Another thing that stood out for me with this book is how incredibly mature a couple or an established threesome has to be to have a polyamory-styled relationship that works or seems to work. Also, while the author issues warnings about embarking on non-monogamy, one gets the sense that the emotional difficulties and ramifications of opening up are considerably understated. They assume everyone is a swinger, or just greedy and a sex-addict. She is clear that there are many rewards and pitfalls to approaching relationships this way, but ultimately, having the freedom to grow and change within a relationship is the bottom line.
Our relationships are the same way - they evolve and change as our experiences shape our reality. I was into the ideal of a threesome and into the ideal of supporting Sam to pursue this relationship with someone he had a really deep connection with. I don't want to define it by what it doesn't have, though, as the book is full of people telling their own stories about how they have made their relationships work. How do you define a committed relationship? Now, I am very comfortable with the certain people without alienate their relationships with others than just a spouse. To find such a content-rich book that is unreservedly supportive of the spectrum in between mono and poly styles has been a joy and a treasure.
I decided to buy it and ended up deciding on the audio version. The Shepards are swingers, and the Lamberts want in. The implication is that you own your partner, your partner's activities and how they conduct themselves. It is ok to breakup when none of those things are being respected. Taormino holding a for her work Chemistry 2007 In addition to writing, speaking and sex education, she considers herself a feminist pornographer. This book will be most interesting to those relatively new to thinking about, or doing, open relationships. By shattering countless misconceptions, fabrications, myths and rumors about open relationships, Taormino also brings to light the fact that monogamy is a choice and not an expectation.